Tuesday, October 30, 2007

Kai in a jungle

This is my photo taken last year in a jungle in Prachinburi. I like this photo a lot as it's quite natural- no cosmetic and no pretending smile. However, I always think that I look too plain.

According to Buddhist teachings, we should not concern very much about our appearance and looking as they are subject to change all the time. It is very impermanent and we cant stop or do anything with it. After having observd eight precepts for three months which means I have never used any cosmetic, facial treatment or lotion, I realize this truth. My face is much drier. There are more wrinkles esp under my eyes. I am also darker as UV protection got no chance to touch my face. There is no doubt that I look worse than before. However, I have found that I am much more calm. The peace has been grown up in my little heart beautifully. I can smile widely with a brither heart to everyone that now I have developed myself on the right track. The journey is still very long, but every step is the means to a peaceful end. There is no uselessness of any little body and mental practice.

The apologia for my brother

Sorry that I haven't posted for a few months. My excuse is I am very busy during these 2-3 months. There are so many things to do apart from working - studying, reading, researching etc. Anyway, one thing that I always do without laziness is meditation. Ven.Jayasaro said that (and I absolutely agree with him) if we realize that something is important, we will always try hard or put effort on doing that thing without any laziness. I recognize how good meditation is after have meditated more and more. So I meditate everyday - morning and at the night time (before I go to bed).

I have a lot to talk and share with other people, but the most important one is about my guilty feeling I have had for several months. A few months ago, I have done stg that cause my little brother to annoy and feel inconvinient. I have asked myself after being more mindful that 'why the hell you do this'? i couldn't answer that cos I am too embrassed to think of it.

The consequence of my craving is our beautiful relationship has come to the end within only a short time. I got no chance to talk with him or contact him in the future. I cannot apologize him. And I cannot even say good bye to him and wish him luck as he will leave the country very soon.

The Buddha (as transferred by Ven.jayasaro) said that if we have dome something wrong, the best way to manage it is we should confess and intend not to do it anymore. I wanna confess and apoligize him here - in case he might wander around my blog.

"Whatever I have done by body, speech and mind intentionally and unintentionally since the past til now, I really apologize for that. Please forgive me".

I bow my hear to your feet...Loung Nong.

I hope you will always be successful in the next step of your life. I am really sure you will achive in whatwvwe you intend. May happiness and peace always be with you.